Doc Tales

February 13, 2019 — 

The following story was recently relayed to me. "Some time ago, I attended a meeting of university researchers. They were having a fairly spirited "discussion" of proper scientific methodology, each exhibiting a bias towards their particular specialty. At one point, a gentleman in the back blurted out, "I'm an epidemiologist, not a damn statistician, Harold!" In response, another gentleman, who I assume was Harold, stood up and said, "Daniel, all that means is that you can describe the distribution of doors in this room. As a statistician, I can estimate the probability that a particular door will hit you on the butt on your way out!" This resulted in an audible gasp from the audience. In the midst of the rising clamor, another researcher stood up and said, "Gentlemen, I think I can help you figure out the most likely outcome of this discussion. You see, I'm a modeler...." To which the entire room groaned. The exchange was actually all in good fun and some friendly bantering, but I thought it was funny."